It’s Mond… Tuesday, which means it’s time for the UK Wrestling Analysis of Monday Night Raw #1653! Previously live from the State Farm Arena, Atlanta, Georgia, USA.
The UK Wrestling Archive, as the name suggests, is UK Wrestling-centric however in conjunction with the TWIST Network, we will also be offering reviews of major events which feature UK and Irish wrestlers.
What sounds like Michael Cole welcomes us, via voiceover, to Monday Night Raw and, following a quick crowd pan, we head backstage to witness to arrival of Cody & Brandi Rhodes with who I assume is their daughter, whom Google informs me is named ‘Liberty’ . We also witness the arrivals(s) of the teams of Bianca Belair/ Naomi and Liv Morgan/ Raquel Rodriguez, followed by Sami Zayn, who seems to acknowledge two different people we either never see or who completely ignore him. Finally Drew McIntyre arrives and simultaneously ignores the camera and flexes his right bicep as he walks so either he was pretending the camera wasn’t there while also playing to it or simply walks around randomly flexing. Some drone footage follows, a quick circuit of the arena and we descend towards the ring where we see the production assistants cue Michael Cole. It’s an oddly ‘unpolished’ moment but it works.
Cole and Pat McAfee run through the results of Saturday Night’s Main Event and then it feels like McAfee misses his cue for a “LET’S GOOOOOO” which has considerably less weight behind it than previous efforts.
First, we are BURNING IT DOWN as Seth Rollins makes his entrance, dressed in a middle-aged woman’s thrift store Pyjamas and what look painted Safety Googles. I don’t get it but whatever he likes, I guess. Seth goes through his usual routine, though slightly quicker than normal. Still, I cannot lie, I was thankful for Netflix’ ’10-second skip’ feature because the man likes to ramble… Thankfully the World Champion, Gunther, interrupts to break the monotony. Gunther, who is billed at 6’4″ is actually notably taller than Seth, who I believed was taller. Gunther calls Seth out on his false narrative by countering with simple logic. Gunther is actually doing a masterful job at shutting down Seth’s repeated rambling efforts and I have to wonder just how much was adlibbed. Sadly we are interrupted again, this time by Logan Paul. I don’t like him, I don’t like his ‘products’, I’ve never knowingly watched any of his YouTube content. I’m out.
The ’10-second skip’ function is spammed until we see Cathy Kelley & CM Punk. Apparently Logan Paul has declared for the Royal Rumble. Joy. Unfortunately the relief of Logan Paul not being on my screen is short-lived as Sami Zayn interrupts the segment. Sami breaks out some amazingly flawed logic when he insincerely acknowledges that he (Zayn) and Punk are indeed NOT on the same level because he (Zayn) has main-evented Wrestlemania and Punk has not. I dislike Sami Zayn’s character. It’s grating and condescending in all the wrong ways.
Sami walks away muttering as if he’s somehow been wronged, straight into Karrion Kross, whom he advises he doesn’t have time for, immediately before stopping to listen to. Karrion Kross walks away, only to be replaced by Cody Rhodes who despite there being zero chance that he did not just watch Kross walk away, seems puzzled by Sami’s demeanour.
Cut to Judgment Day’s Dominik Mysterion & JD McDonagh, standing on front of a screen showing what I assume to be WWE 2k24 footage of Dom beating on Eric of the Viking Raiders. It’s a nice touch. Quick shot of the Viking Raiders, followed by some Atlanta onscreen graphics and we’re back Judgment Day in the ring and the favoured overly long shots of ‘celebrities’ in the crowd whom I don’t know but whom the camera lingers on just long enough to be uncomfortable. Funny to note though that some of them actually get bored of trying to think of new ways to not simply stand awkwardly but simply sit back down again.
Viking Raiders make their entrance for their first defence of the WWE World Tag Team Championship and match #1 is introduced. The bell rings and Judgment Day blind side the War Raiders, dumping Ivar to the outside and double teaming Eric. Eric fights back briefly but the 2 on 1 is too much as Judgment Day take control again. McDonagh with a springboard moonsault from the second rope, via the apron onto Ivar but seems to land badly. I don’t think anyone is a fault but JD really seemed to hit the back of his head off the announce table with a louder thud than seems healthy. Michael Cole seems to confirm as he makes repeated reference to it. Replay seems to confirm is wasn’t just his head but also his upper back. He has to at least have whiplash after that.
JD seems to confirm he’s alright but certainly doesn’t look alright. Less JD tagging out and more Dom tagging in but only briefly as JD looks like he does the same. JD repeatedly seems to confirm his status but doesn’t look right. It’s not that the War Raiders are clumsy but they are heavy handed and JD looks to be favouring his ribs while repeatedly giving cues that he’s good to continue. Dom and JD take several big bumps for the War Raiders. Alas even Carlito’s interference cannot help as Dom succumbs to a War Machine and takes the Pinfall loss as War Raiders retain.
WWE World Tag Team Championship Match:
The War Raiders (Eric & Ivar) (Champions) defeat The Judgment Day (Dominik Mysterio & JD McDonagh) by Pinfall (Eric over Dominik Mysterio)
In the back Ludwig Kaiser approaches Pete Dunne who immediately threatens him before are interrupted by the New Day who still seem to look for comradery which they do not get. Dunne and Kaiser walk off as Cathy Kelley approaches to interview New Day. Kofi asserts that ‘Atlanta’s Favourite Son’ has come home, clearly gesturing towards a grinning Xavier Woods. Kelley seems confused and believes Kofi is referring to Bron Breakker, before instead suggesting Austin Theory. She finally clicks though and states ‘Cody Rhodes’. Woods clarifies that it is in fact he who is whom Kofi is referring and that he (Woods) will defeat Rey Mysterio in front of his (Woods’) Father, Mother and Sister.
Cathy sends it back to ringside, just in time for Rey Mysterio, flanked by the LWO, to make his entrance. It always bothered me that Rey just one day decided to reform the LWO, a WCW faction whom he feuded with throughout 1998 and only joined as a result of losing a match with a pre-match stipulation that he had to join if he did not win. But, that was I now realise, 26 years ago and some change and many will have no idea what I’m even referring to.
More awkward crowd shots of celebrities I don’t know and then of New Day grumbling that reserved seating (for Woods’ family) remains empty. Odd though that he named 3 people but there are 6 empty chairs, with 5 having ‘Reserved Seating’ signs attached.
Kofi harasses Pat McAfee as the bell rings and we are underway. References to Big E are coming in thick and fast which leads me to believe he’s medically cleared to return, perhaps at Royal Rumble?
Woods mostly dominates the match but Mysterio with a number of Lazarus-esque comebacks to break up Woods’ momentum. Mid-match Woods’ family show up, for some reason accompanied by one of the afore-mentioned celebrities, taking their number to 4, for 6 seats. Seeing his family, Woods goes out to greet them, asking them where they’d been. In response his parents open their jackets to reveal ‘The New Day Sucks’ T-Shirts while his sister struggles to unfold and weakly waves a similar shirt. Irate, Woods returns to the ring but is outmanoeuvred by Mysterio, falling ‘just so’ onto the middle rope in a manner in which no wrestler no wrestling Rey Mysterio ever does, in order to receive a 619 and splash. Mysterio takes the Pinfall.
The War Raiders (Eric & Ivar) (Champions) defeat The Judgment Day (Dominik Mysterio & JD McDonagh) by Pinfall (Eric over Dominik Mysterio)
Video recap of last week when Sami Zayn kicked Seth Rollins in the face, then to backstage where Zayn tries to reassure Rollins that the kick was inadvertent. Rollins accepts it was a mistake but states should it happen again, he (Rollins) will be less certain it was another mistake.
It’s time for ‘Mid Card’ Jey Uso, entering through the crowd with, ‘Quavo’ carrying a Smoking Skull title belt like it’s 1999. To be fair, the whole ‘Yeet’ thing is popular with the crowd. McAfee makes reference to ‘Blue Pill Yeeting all over the place’ and both he and Cole make reference to pulling hamstrings from ‘Yeeting’ so much. Uso cuts a live promo will still standing on the announce table, in the staccato, 3 or 4 words at a time style he uses these days.
Backstage Lyra Valkryria is being interviewed just feet away from American Alpha making content for ‘the socials’ but who are somehow completely quiet until after, Valkyria is interrupted by American Made and Ivy Nile tells Valkyria she’s going to eliminate her from the Royal Rumble. Thoughtfully, Valkyria leaves, allowing American Made to then realise content is being made and take the required 2 steps to encounter Akira Tozawa and (a very balding) Otis busting the moves as Maxine Dupri encourages them while filming on her iPhone. American Made berate American Alpha with the iPhone in shot for more than sufficient time to notice that it’s only been recording for around the length of time the segment has gone on.
We return to ringside and the Judgment Day’s Liv Morgan & Raquel Rodriguez are in the ring as the Women’s Tag Team Champs, Bianca Belair & Naomi make their entrance for this non-title match. ‘Dirty’ Dominik Mysterio distracts the referee enough for Raquel to chokeslam Naomi onto the apron and then roll her into the ring for Liv to get the Pinfall.
The Judgment Day (Liv Morgan & Raquel Rodriguez) defeat (WWE Women’s Tag Team Champions) Bianca Belair & Naomi by Pinfall (Liv Morgan over Naomi)
Backstage, a couple of violence-free interactions between Women’s World Champion, Rhea Ripley and Bailey, whom Rhea wishes luck after she (Bailey) suggests Rhea will face her at Wrestlemania, the insinuation being that Bailey will win the Royal Rumble. Ripley exists stage left and Bailey walks into Iyo Sky who simply says ‘See You Saturday’.
Back to ringside and Michael Cole reminds us that he’s the only undefeated announcer in Wrestlemania history. A short recap video is played and Pay McAfee just roasts Cols at one point simply stating he (Cole) ‘looks like an asshole’. The two are very obviously friends and it was obviously all good natured.
An amazingly long and very awkward camera shot on yet another ‘face in the crowd’, Kai Cenat, who is apparently ‘one of the most popular streamers in the world’ and whom I have never heard of. Followed by a Penta video package, highlighting his best matches in WWE, which unsurprisingly given he’s had 2 matches total, is not especially varied.
A Royal Rumble promo airs, before Paul Heyman makes his way to the ring. Heyman reveals that Roman Reign is on the cover art for the new WWE 2K25 game. Heyman is interrupted by Drew McIntyre who says Paul looks nervous. He questions whether likes him but also tells him not to open his mouth to answer. McIntyre goes on to state that he (McIntyre) is the ‘daddy’ of the Bloodline, referencing the chain of events which led to the formation of the Bloodline. McIntyre goes to ask Paul to do him a favour and tell his boy ‘that McIntyre is going to eliminate him from the Royal Rumble. Heyman confirms that yes, he will pass McIntyre’s sentiments to Roman Reigns however McIntyre corrects him that Roman Reigns knows McIntyre is going to eliminate him, he (McIntyre) instead wants Heyman to tell his boy, CM Punk. Then tells Paul to run.
Drew McIntyre is already in the ring as Sami Zayn makes his entrance and we’re underway. Drew dominates early but Zayn rallies and begins to take control. Zayn has a busted nose which will make the rest of this match harder work than it already is. The commentators remind us that Zayn has never beaten McIntyre which historically, would have meant that Zayn was winning. Not tonight however as McIntyre takes the win, albeit with his feet on the ropes.
Drew McIntyre defeated Sami Zayn by Pinfall
Post match, McIntyre attacks Zayn, prompting Cody Rhodes to run down for the assist. He and McIntyre trade blows but Kevin Owens emerges from the crowd to attack Rhodes. Rhodes turns the tables on him before McIntyre drags Rhodes off Owens and into the corner. Them for the second week in a row, the man who just does not learn, Sami Zayn, opts to attempt the Helluva Kick, bearing in mind that he best he could hope for is kicking both McIntyre AND Rhodes, instead only kicks Rhodes when McIntyre dodges out the way. All bar Rhodes vacate the ring and CM Punk makes his way out. A overly long, honestly not particularly interesting, and largely unnatural feeling exchange between Rhodes and Punk follows to close the show.
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